September 8, 2008
I dreamed that we, a group of adults, including AMVI and, for some reason, my mother, were traveling by subway to visit someone. I was wearing a tank top that exposed my shoulders, and I felt a bit cold. When we exited the train, we almost got lost in the crowd. I approached Vika, who looked lost as though she couldn’t see anyone familiar and thought she had gotten lost. At that moment, our group (and, as it seemed, some other people from the crowd) repeatedly chanted in low but calm voices, “No to Google!” and we continued walking towards the subway exit.
I wish they had chanted “No to Soup!”
September 8, 2008
Whenever I dream of mailboxes, it means something very specific. In my dreams, the mailboxes are nothing like regular ones. In my dreams, mailboxes somehow contain things that shouldn’t be there. Of course, there are compartments marked by apartment number, but in these compartments, there are usually many things besides mail: jewels, money, books, etc. Today, while inspecting a mailbox, I found several books, diamond earrings, American coins, and some junk that had nothing to do with mail.
September 14, 2008 – Strange Nights
In this apartment, I have strange dreams. Recently, I moved in with some relative, a very strange man, who was either my uncle or someone else, some weird figure. But for some reason, I needed a place to stay, and he offered a free space. He lived in a house, and I moved in with my cat. I was given a small room, which seemed to have no bed, just a folding cot. Immediately, my “relative” started behaving very strangely, trying to scare me in every way. And he himself was pretty terrifying; if you saw him at night on the street, you’d run instinctively… In short, it wasn’t fun there, so I decided to run away. I got in a car and drove off. But then, the road (just like in horror movies!) started behaving completely unpredictably. The incline became very steep, increasing to almost 80 degrees, and I was driving on an almost vertical road. I don’t know how my car kept moving, according to the laws of physics, it should have been impossible, but it kept going, and I was terrified because, first, there were several other cars (in front of and behind me), second, it was raining heavily, and the road was icy, and third, it was a one-way road, so I couldn’t even turn around and drive back. I had to get through this stretch. It would have been even scarier ahead, because the icy road and downpour would’ve made that road deadly, but this episode ended, smoothly transitioning into a warm, cozy apartment belonging to some friends, where I was telling them about the treacherous road and my terrifying relative. Later, I still had to go back to get my cat, who my relative had started tormenting, and although this episode ended, I still woke up in fear.
Today, I had another rather strange dream, more strange than scary. First, I dreamt about my boyfriend – a guy with an Asian face (probably closer to Kazakh or Uzbek), long black hair, and an incredibly beautiful body. His name was Sergey. Then, I dreamt that I somehow ended up with a wardrobe full of old dresses, which were immediately sold at auction for almost 1000 dollars. I didn’t even have time to blink. After that, I dreamt I was calling my dad in Moscow. And then I woke up, and I really did need to call my dad in Moscow.
October 22, 2008
The other day, I moved in with some strange relative, a very peculiar man, who was either my uncle or someone else—a very strange and unclear figure. But for some reason, I needed somewhere to stay, and he offered a space for free. He lived in a house, and I moved in with my cat. I was given a small room, which didn’t even seem to have a bed—just a cot. Immediately, my “relative” started behaving very strangely and trying to scare me.
He himself looked pretty frightening—someone you’d instinctively run away from if you saw him on the street at night. Anyway, it wasn’t very pleasant, so I decided to run away. I got in a car and drove off. But the road (just like in a horror movie!) started behaving unpredictably. It began to tilt at an incredibly steep angle, almost 80 degrees. I was driving on nearly a vertical road. I don’t know how my car kept moving; according to the laws of physics, it shouldn’t have been possible.
But it was going, and I was terrified because, firstly, there were a few other cars in front of and behind me, secondly, there was heavy rain, and the road was icy, and thirdly, it was a one-way road, so I couldn’t turn around and go back. I had to get through that stretch. Further on, it would have been even scarier because the icy road and downpour would have made it deadly, but this episode ended, smoothly transitioning into the warm, cozy apartment of some friends where I was telling them about the killer road and my terrifying relative. Afterward, I had to go back to retrieve my cat, whom my relative had started torturing. Although this episode ended, I woke up in fear.
Today, I had another quite strange dream, more strange than scary.
At first, I dreamed of my boyfriend—a guy with an Asian face (probably closer to Kazakh or Uzbek), long black hair, and an insanely beautiful body. His name was Seryozha. Then I dreamed that I somehow obtained a wardrobe full of old dresses, which were immediately sold at an auction for almost $1000. I didn’t even blink an eye. Then I dreamed that I was calling my father in Moscow. And then I woke up, realizing I really needed to call my dad in Moscow.
November 22, 2008
Today, I dreamed that I was a participant on the “Podium” project and got eliminated after the first round, where I had to make a fashion wall newspaper on a wooden board. Before that, I had been a hired killer and felt like I was inside a 3D movie, pulling out guns from everywhere and killing enemies instantly. Then I would flip tables and live such an active and aggressive lifestyle that even Mr. and Mrs. Smith would envy. In addition, I had to accompany a very important boy, and in the end, I found out he was killed right in my arms. I cried a lot, but that was the mission.
Then, in an elevator, I killed two guys at once, pulling out two pistols from my waistband like a seasoned hitman and took money and mobile phones from their pockets—all because the day before someone had ordered me, and I had almost been killed myself. All the action (except for the boy’s death) felt like a movie, and there were no regrets or worries. Just a job. A show. I can’t even say if I felt like a man. I didn’t have very clear feelings, but I was probably a woman. Then, when I was running away with the phones and money, I got a call from Irisha, and we started discussing our festival. These are the amazing things that happen in my dreams.
November 22, 2008
And today I dreamed that I was a queen, and a boy who looked like Robbie Williams secretly loved me. We, along with my entourage, went somewhere in BMW cars, and there we were taken hostage—me and some of my entourage. I knew Robbie Williams would come to rescue me. But I woke up, surprised to see that I had slept for over 12 hours (probably catching up on the past week). I would have slept even longer, but I got too hot under two blankets. It’s a pity, I really wanted to see Robbie Williams rescuing me and the subsequent scene of him confessing his love to me, warming my heart, and ending with “happily ever after.” Oh…
November 27, 2008
Although I don’t often dream about sex, I wouldn’t write about this event if it hadn’t been… unusual. The sex itself was quite ordinary, except for the fact that, contrary to the “sleeping” sex law, it not only felt very real, but also reached a climax, and I enjoyed it without waking up (which usually doesn’t happen).
So, I dreamed that I was sleeping (!) in the very same bed I sleep in now, and through my sleep, I felt someone undressing me. I was lying on my stomach and could very clearly feel the unmistakable actions toward me. In the dream (in the real one!), I naturally thought someone was really undressing me (although I was sleeping without clothes). In the dream, I woke up, sat up in bed, and saw that no one was there. At the same time, in the dream, you can’t tell if it’s a dream or reality. It felt like reality, but in fact, it was still a dream. My consciousness thought I had really woken up, checked to see that no one was there, and then went back to sleep. I fell asleep but immediately felt the same hands on my body, the same movements.
This time, I really “woke up” in the dream and realized (while still sleeping) what was happening to me. And surprisingly, I didn’t jump up or run to call the police; I just gave in to the pleasure… Of course, events started to unfold that made me realize I was dreaming, but I still woke up, marveled, and went back to sleep. By the way, the man in the dream had dramatically changed, which happens sometimes in dreams. The apartment was also a little different, though it was hard to realize I was still dreaming. Sometimes it happens, but not this time.
December 13, 2008
A new house that my mom and I were moving into, Sasha Parushina, who had given me her cats for short-term care—one big black cat and a small white one—and took them away in a high woven vase while I was rollerblading… I wanted us to be friends again, and she promised we would. Then very clearly—my new house with my mom. And it had a small annex just a few dozen meters away: a little house. And I was sitting in that little house by the window when I suddenly noticed the most incredible otherworldly view outside: a brightly green hill, trees of even darker green with rounded crowns and some with crowns stretching upwards in a southern style.
The hill had a few small houses, all white with white roofs. The sky was an insane color, just like before a thunderstorm, with part of the sky dark and deep, grayish-purple, and beneath it everything dark as if at dusk, while part of it was still blue, with sunbeams breaking through and lighting everything up. This whole scene looked so rich, so vivid, so calm, so stirring that I shouted, “Mom, mom, look at this insane beauty!”—and my heart was pounding so strongly, I almost cried from how beautiful it was…
But then the phone rang, and I had to leave that world…